


bless this mess

by girljustdied



Category: Veronica Mars (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-10-31
Updated: 2009-10-31
Packaged: 2019-10-04 20:16:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,267
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17311160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/girljustdied/pseuds/girljustdied
Summary: even if lilly had lived, things still would have fallen apart.





	bless this mess

**Author's Note:**

> prompt was “when all is said and done.”

“Come on, Veronica,” Lilly whines. “Time to stop moping—and start looking for a new boy to love and lose and mope about all over again!”

“Gee, when you put it like that—” she plops down on her bed with a sigh, back slouched.

“I’m serious,” her friend’s already looking though her closet for things for the both of them to wear. “It’s simple arithmetic. Shelly Pomeroy’s party is for the elite, and we’re it, girlfriend.”

“How’s this for an equation: subtract me from the party, and you’ll still have the time of your life. So—” she sing-songs, doesn’t finish the thought.

It’s just for show, even Veronica can admit that her math there isn’t exactly solid.

-

“Is Duncan going to be there?” her mother goes for nonchalance and fails terribly.

“Probably,” she hedges. Can’t stop the hope that bubbles out of her, “Maybe I could try to talk to him again, find out what made him—”

“Maybe you just need to accept that it’s for the best, Veronica,” Mom interrupts, takes a strangely short sip out of her water bottle. “I never thought he was good enough for you. Not for my only little girl. He comes from a cruel, cruel family.”

Her mother touches her hair sloppily, starts to mess it up a little bit.

“Mom,” Veronica whines, backs away and turns to leave. “Stop that.”

-

Her best friend disappears with Casey for most of the night, and Duncan’s making out with Shelly at the bar, hands all over her. It’s pretty much exactly what she was afraid getting the elite privilege of experiencing when she gave in to going to this stupid thing.

“Hey, Ronnie,” Logan’s drunk as hell. “Where’s your sluttier half?”

“She still doesn’t want to talk to you, Logan.” Almost adds a ‘get over it,’ but doesn’t quite have the heart. She isn’t exactly one to talk. “Maybe if—”

“You know, _maybe_ if you had talked to me before ratting me out—”

“Logan,” she interrupts. God, she wants to just hit him upside the head sometimes.

“I thought we were friends, too, you know,” his moods shift even easier than normal when he’s full of tequila. “But I guess not, huh?”

-

It makes absolutely no sense for Veronica to find herself waking up still at Shelly’s, spooning with Logan Echolls in some random guest room. She closes her eyes tight and takes a deep breath. They both seem to have all their clothes on. That’s good. She tries to crawl out from under his arm without waking him.

“Veronica?” he slurs, no dice. She sighs as he digs the heels of his palms into his eyes. “Fuck, did we—?”

“I remember coming in here to be alone,” she fills in, pulls her dress further down her thighs. Thinks she can vaguely remember crawling into his lap and pressing her lips to his.

“Me, too,” he chimes in slowly, touches his mouth. “I, uh, can’t really remember anything else. You were upset, maybe? Crying?”

Yeah, probably. They agree to never talk about it again.

-

“I’m very disappointed in you, Veronica,” her father tugs at his sheriff’s uniform uncomfortably. Had obviously been waiting for her all night, didn’t even change.

“I’m sorry, Dad,” she hedges, under no circumstances will let out that she had gotten very drunk and may or may not have fooled around with a movie star’s son. He’d never look at her the same way again. “I should have called and let you know what I was doing. I know that—”

“You should have _called_?” He laughs in disbelief. “You’re sixteen, Veronica. Not forty. Maybe we’ve been wrong to be so lenient with you.”

He grounds her from any social contact outside of school for two weeks. It could be a hell of a lot worse. That, she can handle.

-

“Aren’t you the least bit curious?” Lilly needles.

Sure, she’s always curious. It’s kind of her nature. But that doesn’t mean she wants to know every minute detail of her friend’s sex life—like Lilly would have secrets about anything else.

“Just because I’m curious doesn’t mean I’m gonna beg,” Veronica teases, stretching out on the couch to reach a bag of popcorn.

“But begging’s the best part,” Lilly gives right back, eyes twinkling when Duncan and Logan start to pass by on the way to Duncan’s room. “Isn’t that right, Logan?”

“You’d know better than me, sugarpuss.”

He won’t even look at Veronica. Even Duncan can do that.

-

“Oh, hey, Veronica,” her ex blurts out after she bumps into him turning a corner.

“Hi,” she says as brightly as she can, arms crossing over her chest. “Uh, how’s it going?”

“Well, actually, Miss. Dent wanted me to ask you to take some pictures for that surfing story I’m writing.”

“Oh,” is all she can say to that. It’s getting less and less painful to be in the same room with Duncan—but no less awkward, that’s for sure. “Okay.”

“I can give you a ride, if you want. It’s a few counties over.”

A world of no, Duncan Kane. “Oh, that’s okay, I can drive myself. Thanks, though.”

-

She drives herself to homecoming and tries not to think about dances past. Things are getting good again—they really are. She’s meeting a recently-single Meg there for a night of girl power and punch.

It doesn’t matter that Lilly shows up on the back of Weevil’s motorcycle, or that Duncan shows up with Shelly, or that Logan doesn’t seem to show up at all.

“Are you okay, Veronica? You look a little melancholy.”

“No, yeah, no—I’m fine. Wanna slow dance?”

“Very funny.”

-

“Did you hear?” Lilly drags Duncan behind her. “Duncan, tell her.” Duncan’s quiet, though, so Lilly continues, “Logan totally got suspended today. Apparently Daddy Dearest has been quite the philanderer. It’s all over the tabloids.”

“What does that have to do with Logan getting in trouble?” Seems to be the logical question.

“Chardo was making fun of him,” Duncan says slowly. “They got into a pretty big fight.”

“It was totally epic, Veronica!” Lilly sighs dramatically. “I’d totally forgotten how passionate he can be. Maybe I was a bit hasty completely cutting _all_ our ties.”

A strange urge bubbles up inside of her when Lilly winks—she wants to tell Lilly to leave him alone. Doesn’t.

-

Logan shows up at her window a few nights later, raps on the glass to wake her up.

“I need your help,” he wraps his jacket around him like it’s all he has left.

She makes him crawl through the window to talk to her inside. He winces when he moves, his breathing jagged.

“Someone’s leaking information about my dad to the tabloids,” his voice is stone cold. “I want to know who.”

She asks him if he thinks the rumors are lies, and he laughs bitterly.

“No. I just want to make them stop. My mom—” his voice cracks and breaks off. “She’s not taking this very well, and all the press isn’t helping.”

She tells him she’ll use her father’s resources if she can see what the hell is giving him so much pain. He regards her for a long time before he lets her see his back covered in bright red welts.

-

Her dad sits her down one morning, face serious and drawn.

“Look, if this is about me using your badge—” she starts until he cuts her off.

“Veronica,” he chastises for a split second before switching gears. “This is important. This is about your mother.”

She’s gone. Disappeared. Abandoned them. Only left a fucking note promising that one day Veronica would understand. She understands already. The hero is the one that stays. The villain is the one that splits.

-

“Did you know that our parents were high school sweethearts?” Duncan asks with feigned casualness.

“You’re kidding.”

He isn’t. He tells her that he thinks they might be having an affair again, that he wants to find out for sure. That Logan had told him she was pretty good at finding shit out.

She’s also good at keeping a secret. Turns out that it was Lynn herself that was leaking all those stories about Aaron. It looks like she’s gonna get a whopper of a divorce settlement.

She’s surprised that Logan would mention it at all. They hadn’t exactly braided new friendship bracelets to commemorate the experience.

-

She can’t talk to Lilly about this. Sure as hell can’t go to Duncan. Needs someone she can trust, and after staring into space for a long time trying to decide if there’s anyone else, she texts Logan with slow, trembling fingers. Asks him to meet her at Dog Beach.

“Did Duncan ever tell you why he broke up with me?”

He kicks at the sand, eyes on the horizon, “I thought you were over that.”

“I think that he might be my half-brother.”

He laughs loudly until she punches him in the shoulder. “I’m sorry, but it’s just so _General Hospital_. I can’t wait until your evil twin shows up.”

She kicks him hard in the shin and tells him that she’s already there.

-

Summer goes by too fast, like a dream. Lilly demands her every waking hour, and Veronica has the most fun she’s had in a while. Her best friend is in a lot of ways the best kind of escape, a world in herself full of fantasy and sex and rock and roll.

“This is what it’ll be like from now on,” she grins across the water at her friend. “Right, Lilly?”

“Sure. After we’re done with school, it’ll be just like this. Hot chicks in bikinis, basking in the sunlight, drinking mai tais twenty-four seven.”

“We’ll die of skin cancer together.”

“Screw that,” Lilly smirks. “My death’s gonna be much more fabulous.”

-

“What are you guys gonna do without me around, huh?”

Lilly leans her hip against her college gift: a brand new, bright red convertible. It’s the first time the four of them have been in the same place since both break-ups and Shelly’s party, but instead of feeling awkward and weird, it’s kind of like coming home again.

“I’m looking forward to finally being queen bee,” Logan quips.

“And I’ll certainly enjoy having a car all to myself,” Duncan chips in with a little less bite.

Veronica can’t play along. Hugs Lilly tight and whispers how much she’ll miss her. Wants to cry and laugh at the same time when the boys join in on the embrace with mocking little “awws.”

-

“Look, really, I’d rather go to a stylist—” she sputters, tries to tug her hair out of his grasp and sticks out her tongue when he doesn’t let go.

“What, so you can chicken out?” he teases, and twirls the scissors playfully. “Again?”

“Lo-gan,” she draws out the syllables in his name and pouts over her shoulder at him.

It makes his smirk kind of slide into a grin, and it’s really hard not to smile back. Their faces are so close. She could just lean forward and—

“Hey,” he murmurs, voice a bit rough.

“It’s a really big change,” the words pop out of her mouth. “I don’t want to just go into it without, you know—” her words trail off.

“Yeah,” he’s not talking about her hair. “I know.”

-

“I’m back,” her mother says with a smile. Opens her arms for a hug, but Veronica can’t make herself budge from her spot. “Come on, Veronica. I missed you so much. I can explain everything.”

She wants to scream accusations, wants to demand to know what her relationship really is to the Kanes, but she doesn’t want to hurt her dad.

“Your mother’s been through a lot, Veronica,” he pipes up slowly and carefully.

“I’ve been in rehab for the past eight months,” her mother’s voice is choked with cheesy sincerity. “I know I haven’t been the best that I can be, but I want—I need to make that up to you. Please let me.”

-

“What’s up, Veronica?” Duncan asks casually when he shows up at the coffee place she’d just started working at to get out of the house. “I know you wanted me to come a bit later, but I’m supposed to meet Logan so I hoped you could maybe take your break now?”

She asks Jackie if she’ll just cover the rest of her shift for her and leaves to meet Duncan out by his car.

“I just had something I wanted to tell you,” her voice slow and measured. “Something I thought that you should know.”

He reacts surprisingly well to the news that she absolutely is not his sister. He’s quiet and shocked for a moment before smiling with relief. For a split second, she thinks that he might kiss her and she stumbles back a few steps immediately.

“I’ve gotta, uh, get back to work.” She hides inside until his car is just a spec in the distance.

-

He’s waiting on the steps that lead up to her door, arms hooked around his knees.

“Hey, Logan,” she says softly.

“So, what, are you and Duncan gonna get back together now?” he skips the pleasantries, stands and walks past her towards his car. Throws his words back carelessly over his shoulder, “Two point five rugrats and a cocker spaniel?”

“What are you doing?”

“I don’t know,” he yanks his door open. “Leaving.”

“Wait,” she jogs forward to catch up with him, grabs him by the wrist and then he’s spinning towards her, mouth crushing against hers.

-

The rest, as they say, is pretty much history.  



End file.
